Oh, Jim Gaffigan, I Love You

First time I saw him perform, I admit it. I hated him. But now? OMFG. He might be the funniest man alive. (Don’t worry, the Ex holds no false ideas that he’s funny. Nor does he read this blog.) Anyway, my favorite Gaffigan commentary of all time (and, no, it’s NOT “Hooooooooootttttt pockets!”) has to do with our sad gift-giving habits:

It can be hard to give a gift. I can’t believe we’re still giving clothing as a gift, because whenever you get clothing as a gift you open it up and think ‘not even close.’ And the person who gives it is like ‘you can take it back if you don’t like it!’ That’s all right, I’ll just throw it out. Don’t give me an errand. ‘Happy birthday, why don’t you head to the mall for me?’

Did you ever get a candle as a gift? ‘Hey, thanks. You know I have electricity, right?’

My favorite gift I’ve ever received is a flask. I think giving someone a flask is a nice way of saying ‘Hey, you seem like a drunk on the go. You strike me as needing hard liquor at all times.

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